Grace Stop #1 : Maybe I wasn't overlooked afterall

If I haven't already stated in my previous posts I grew up in a very difficult and dysfunctional family. We all have them, and mine was no worse than anyone else's and I didn't have it as bad as I could have. I wasn't dealt an "unfair" hand, but I was allowed to be derived from a very unhealthy line of people. My failure to see that I am special to anyone including God has been a very evil tact by the enemy to keep the nice generational junk circulating as long as he can. I hope the buck stops here...and if not me, than with my children.

I learned alot of information about my family tree yesterday that I was not aware of before. I knew bits and pieces from both sides, but I guess I became a captive audience to my parents to be allowed to hear some things that I had never heard before. I always am torn to hearing more family stuff because although it helps me to understand the bad fruit that has been produced in my family, it is also very sobering to just how hard it has been to live in this family. I will not indulge in any of the details because that is not necessary. We all have baggage and at least one drunk uncle, if not the drunk uncle it is going to be someone else with some other "secret" problem.

One thing that I did learn that is the most valuable piece of information to me is that I had 1 great grand parent on my father's side who was a believer and then my great great grandparents on my mother's side that were believers...that is it folks :( I was stunned to hear that there were no believers in my family. Some converted later in life, but never fully surrendered and they only secured themselves a fire insurance policy. This was so disheartening to me to hear that Jesus was never a household name. Knowing this helps to explain alot for me. I won't go into all of it b/c quite frankly it is a sure fire way to be brought down. I have had enough of the gloom and doom for one life time, so I will share where I see grace coming into all of this.

I was in about the 1st grade when I attend an Awana club meeting with a neighborhood friend. I went often with her for a while, where I heard about Jesus and learned scripture by memory. One particular night a man gave an alter call, and I remember thinking that I wanted to have Jesus in my heart, and I truly believe that he answered that call. My dad thought I was too young to know what I was talking about, but looking back I believe that it was grace that saw a little girl coming from a sad and wicked line of people who cared for nothing unless it was benefiting them. I believe that God saw that there was potential in my young and sensitive heart to be obedient and desperate for the living water. Every time my a little more of my family was being chipped away, God would place someone in my path to keep me afloat. I drifted along the way, but there is too much evidence in my heart that he never left me to my own devices.

I am so thankful that God could have overlooked me b/c of who and where I was coming from. But he doesn't work that way. He allowed His precious son to die for whosoever would accept...I was a whosoever, but now my name is written on His hand!

Do you find it a coincidence that my husband and I teach the Sparkies in Awana?? I am shepherding little hearts to move into the kingdom just as someone had done for me! What trails of evidence of God's grace do you see threaded into your story?

Jn 3:16