It's not about me??

I sat down this morning to let all things be laid our before the Lord and to let it all out because I know nothing changes until I let Him change me. I think for a long time I have known who Jesus is, but this morning I found myself saying "Who is this Jesus?" I didn't say it this time with a snooty thought "So, who is this Jesus??" I have spoke of Him and even been teaching my children all about His love, while all the while I have been saying in the deep places "maybe for you, but not for me." Unbelief is a really hard thing to conquer, but the Lord was kind enough to guide me through HIS word and show me that I am wrong, and He is right. I found it interesting as I started through Luke to read the Christmas story and see if I can picture it better, understand it more, and put myself there at the scene that the Lord had better plans. I began to move from there back to Isiaiah where I have been going lately.

In going through chapters 44-49, I was greatly humbled at the words "There is no other god." In essence God was clearly saying to me gently "L, there is no other god that you can make that will ever equal what I am. You can make, and make, and buy other gods, but they won't last. They won't save you. They won't bring you peace. They are worthless. Did they stretch out the heavens with their hands? Did they allow their son to leave their royalty and regal position to be born to a poor young girl who did not appear to have any family status? And to be born in a place that was not in a comfortable shelter and had smelly animals surrounding her while she was in the midst of labor? Would those idols have allowed their king to be praised by lowly positioned shepherds, or would they have demanded the king of the city? Would those idols have allowed their child to be raised in a town where one could describe as 'can anything good come from there?' Did they have a son that they were willing to give up, to let be mocked, spit on, have his beard pulled, rejected, whipped and beaten, and then finally nailed to a cross and left to die? Who wants that for their child, and who is certainly going to let their child go for the sake of bringing wholeness, joy, happiness, and eternal life for those who do not deserve a drop of sweat from HIS brow? But the final question is did any of the other idols die for someone besides themselves, only to be brought back to life and is still alive today? I know many are skeptical about the Resurrection of Jesus Christ, but here is my question: Why would anyone want to believe in a god that was made by a man who got hungry and weak, ate his lunch over a fire, and then made the idol? Think about it...that would be like me trying to make a glorious dessert out of a greasy skillet :( It ain't gonna happen... So why would anyone want to bow to something that can't speak even whey I cry out to it? My credit card can't save me, a new book can't save me, a new house, or car...nothing can save me. The bible calls this ignorance, and I have been there and I would totally agree.

I say all of this to show to myself that it doesn't really matter what I believe because God is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow...He is just loving enough to let me join in. It's not about me. Now that is a hard pill to swallow.

Merry Christmas